So a few days ago, I stopped at Dairy Queen and purchased my usual choice, a caramel Moolatte (there is nothing on Earth that tastes better than these) and when I sat in my car, I decided to drive to a different parking lot that wasn’t as crowded. The place was pretty busy and I didn’t want to be using a parking spot that someone else may have needed to use.
So I parked in an adjacent parking lot. When I looked up and in front of me, my view was of an advertisement sign that struck me as extremely silly. I immediately started laughing. Here is a picture of the sign:
Does it strike you as funny when you first glance at it? Evidently, this place, who’s parking lot I was parked at, has a steak and lobster buffet. “What’s so freaking funny about that?” Those were the words Krystal asked me the following day when I had her drive me to that spot and I took a picture of it with my camera. She was confused as to why I brought my camera to begin with and was even more confused as to why I had her drive out of her way (off the freeway) just to take that picture.
I explained to her what I thought was funny about it. That advertisement is funny to me, not because of what was written on it, but because the lobster on the poster. They are having a steak and lobster buffet on Saturdays and here is this picture of a lobster on the sign who appears as if he couldn’t be any more thrilled that people will be coming to stuff their faces with steak and….lobster…the animal that he just happens to be. My guess is that this lobster is either safe from being eaten OR he is going to be eaten and is a total dumbass who doesn’t give a shit.
And what makes things even more funny about this lobster, is that he seems to be welcoming, not only for people to eat him, but for them to begin eating him in his crotch region. As you can see, his claws are out-stretched and his face/head seem to be angled to where it appears as if he is looking at or near his crotch. Therefore, when I look at that sign, I imagine a dumbass lobster saying, “howdy ya’ll!!!! There is a steak and lobster buffet on Saturdays from 5 PM to 9 PM!!! Come on over and eat me, if you want!!! In fact, when you eat me, feel free to start at my crotch!!! I don’t care, it’s all good!”
If I were a lobster, and I was informed that I was to be eaten at a lobster buffet, I definitely wouldn’t have the same outlook and attitude as this lobster. I would be scared shitless. I’d probably resemble the character, Quint from Jaws when he came to the realization that the chances of him being eaten by a shark, were pretty high.
If I heard that there was a steak and Rico Swaff buffet this Saturday, my immediate facial expression would be a frightened one. Something like this:
Nice cavity fillings.
Moving along, if I were a lobster, I wouldn’t be a very good model for the poster. If I were the lobster-model for that advertisement, the sign would look like this:
I can see that poster being detrimental to business. People may think to themselves, “well that lobster looks scared as shit, I don’t wanna eat the poor guy.” I guess it’s probably easier to eat a happy lobster like the one in their ad, then it would be a scared lobster, like me.
If you look at the original lobster, maybe he is able to appear happy because he was guaranteed being safe from being eaten as long as he modeled well for the advertisement pic. If I were a lobster and this was the case, I still wouldn’t be happy. Sure, I may be safe, but my family and friends’ well-being may be in jeopardy. In that scenario, I wouldn’t be scared. In fact, I’d be more confrontational. I am crazy-over-protective of my loved ones. If my loved ones were in danger of being eaten, “buffet style”, I would probably resemble Quint from Jaws, when he was going crazy trying to kill the shark:
Ok, I got it. If my loved ones were in danger of being eaten, “buffet style,” a remake of the movie, “Terminator” would be made, and I would play the role of the T-800 Terminator. My mission would be to protect my loved ones from being eaten at the buffet.
But yeah, it’s just a silly sign, I know. But if that poster accurately depicts lobsters and their feelings towards steak and lobster buffets, then lobsters are total dumbasses.
Speaking of steak and lobster buffet, it sounds pretty freaking good. I may have to try it out.
So what do you think? With a way things are looking for Rick right now, does he have a remote chance of surviving? Is Rick seriously going to go out by being eaten alive by a shark? Is this the death of Rick and the end of The Chronicles of Rico???!!?!?
I may kill off Rick some day and create a new character to be the “mascot” of my blog, but that’s not going to happen for a while. I have plenty more zany stories and many ideas involving Rick that will surely be posted in the future. 😉